Wear Your New Sunglasses the Right Way

So you shopped around and tried on all the styles and after hours (days? weeks?) of searching you picked out the perfect pair of sunglasses. They fit your face right, maybe cover some bags under the eyes, and project the exactly correct attitude to advance your career to untold new heights. You have arrived!

Now comes the time to actually wear them the hip way they were made to be worn. Keep these thoughts in mind to achieve the highest level of hipness and avoid the snickers that unhipness will undoubtedly attract.

Top of the Head Perch
This works well for those of us who have LOTS of hair. People with lots of hair can use their new sunglasses like a barrette or headband, perhaps using them to hold their hair behind their ears. This look is very alluring and many ladies have used it to attract attention. Bald people must avoid perching their sunglasses on their head at all costs. It creates an alien look that is the opposite of alluring. I mean it.

Hooked in an Open Collar Shirt
Ladies can do this one if they wish to attract attention to their cleavage. It works OK for men who use it to enhance an already confident build. Beware of the lack of security, though, and avoid losing your new purchase.

Hooked into the Back Collar
Ladies should never do this. Athletic men suddenly in a situation that requires hands-on action have great appearance success doing this, but desk jockeys not so much.

Hooked into a Belt Loop
This style traces back to the late 1980s when a young man in Los Angeles needed a safe and secure place to put his sunglasses while at the horse races. It has since found wide popularity due to its security, but be aware that others will not notice your new sunglasses. How is that fun? Ladies have other options better suited to them and should avoid this move.

Enjoy your new sunglasses and wear them well so that others can enjoy them, too.